Approach everything with humility

 

Hi, I'm Cat, I finally beat Ven Kinako, and now im stuggling to progress regardless, but hey, Jack and Koritora are here~ And my Syumitaro finally has a fucking skill (lol)

Currently writing this on my phone, not a usual thing for me. For one, formatting on here is hellish, the images have a mind of their own, but it's 5 AM and i closed my laptop already. 

Today was a nice day, I ate at Chili's~ they bought my favorite appetizer back! The spinach queso...it's just as good as I remember it being. Shame it's a limited edition dish...then i went to the supermarket with my dad and got a cinnamon donut and coffee as a treat!

Ok, let me bitch and whine a little bit.

I already talked about this in another post, but i feel like im at some weird standstill when it comes to doing anything creative. For blogging, it's fine, for writing, meh, not sure, but for drawing, that's where everything's going to shit, mentally speaking. I just can not, for the life of me, do this anymore. I really can't. I feel like a gallery of wasted potential. Well, it's really no one's fault but mine because I have this habit of not wanting to draw unless I am totally and entirely sure people will pay attention to me for it. If i get no attention, it's the same as getting nothing out of it. And if i get nothing out of it, then it's not worth it to ever try and draw again...It's honestly disgusting...i want to draw for myself again. I want to be able to draw again. I want to do more for myself. But then again, me wanting this doesn't come from a place of altruism, if anything, it's the polar opposite; my need to draw for attention is selfish, and so is my need to draw for myself, so i really cant win, and i dont know what to do, it's been taking a toll on me all night. Every second i was awake, i felt like scum, it was all i could think about...

But then again, that hate and feeling of Whatever This Is made me wanna distract myself, and distract i did...I progressed some more in MO4, and now im on a raft, and i dont know what to do, its pissing me off. This might be the worst area in the game. But then again, i say that about every area in the game...

My left ear feels like it's gonna explode...well, I'll make this a minipost (lol). Good night!

~Cat